Aftercare

    Aftercare is something you should be doing whether you are in a vanilla relationship or in a kinky relationship. It refers to time and attention given to partners after an intense sexual experience. Scenes are pre-negotiated and involve consent and safe words incase either partner get uncomfortable with the situation at any time. Just like during vanilla sex you still have to be considerate and communicative during sex and when it is all over. 
    
    Aftercare means communicating and taking care of one another after sex. It helps to ensure that all parties are comfortable and satisfied with everything that had happened. Just because safewords aren't used during a scene or during sex you should still check in. See if there are any wounds that need to be given attention and taken care of. 

    "Sub-drop" is what happens when a Submissive feels sad after the endorphins crash and adrenaline fills their body. Dominant's can also experience something similar to a "Sub-drop". It is a type of "postcoital dysphoria". You don't have to of been tied up or whipped to feel sad after sex. In fact you can get it just from a hormonal change experience after an orgasm, but it can also come from feeling neglected. 

    The "orgasm gap" is where a woman, in particular, my feel that their needs in bed are being ignored and not met. It can make them feel lousy. Although having any feelings that are ignored can make anyone feel pretty lousy. 

    Aftercare after sex can make sex better for anyone. Even if it is getting a warm rag and cleaning your partner up after sex. It bring a closeness because it also shows you are comfortable with one another and care for one another very much. Every relationship is different. So your aftercare may be different from others aftercare as well and that's okay. There are a lot of guidelines for BDSM aftercare. Especially if you are out having casual sex. It means letting your guard down and talking about the experience. This can be scary to do if you are out having one night stands, but that is a different situation. 

    People want to know and be reminded that they are worth while, even after they have been sexually gratifying to one. Long-term relationships are definitely not exempt from aftercare. It is something couples should consider to continue doing. Especially after trying something new. Ask if anything hurt, if they didn't like something or if they were okay with everything. Make sure to cuddle, stroke each other's hair or face. Savor the moment. Aftercare like this can make one feel special and important. 

    Aftercare is just a fancy term at the end of the day where you are making sure you are both happy once the sex is over and when you communicate you can learn what is okay, what felt good, what you can do next time to make things hotter. Communication is even important when having sex. So make sure next time you are having sex with your partner or doing an intense scene make sure to give each other aftercare.